"Larry vs. World Again" reads a headline on the front page of USA Today
alongside a photo of the bald, sixtyish man with two first names. We
thought
the Larry Craig story had ended over the long weekend when the convicted
disorderly conductor announced his resignation from the Senate. But the
story
has taken another bizarre twist, and Craig now has put the word out that
he
may not quit.
Craig announced his resignation--or, to be precise, his "intent to
resign...
effective Sept. 30"--on Saturday. The next day, Sen. Arlen Specter told
Chris
Wallace of "Fox News Sunday":
I'd still like to see Sen. Craig fight this case. He left
himself some daylight, Chris, when he said that he intends to
resign in 30 days. I'd like to see Larry Craig go back to court,
seek to withdraw his guilty plea and fight the case. I've had
some experience in these kinds of matters since my days as
Philadelphia district attorney, and on the evidence, Sen. Craig
wouldn't be convicted of anything. And he's got his life on the
line and 27 years in the House and Senate, and I'd like to see
him fight the case, because I think he could be vindicated.
We took this to be one of Specter's eccentric musings--remember "Scottish
law"?--but it now appears Craig left himself that "daylight" on the advice
of
Specter. Last night a Craig spokesman put out the word that he may not
resign
after all after Roll Call, a Capitol Hill newspaper, obtained a voice-mail
message Craig had meant for his lawyer, Billy Martin, but left instead on
someone else's phone when he dialed he wrong number. The MP3 is here:
http://www.rollcall.com/audiofiles/larrycraig.mp3
Craig begins by saying that "Arlen Specter is now willing to come
out"--please, suppress those snickers--"in my defense." He continues:
We have reshaped my statement a little bit to say it is my
intent to resign on Sept. 30. I think it is important for you
to make as bold a statement as you are comfortable with this
afternoon, and I would hope you could make it in front of the
cameras. I think it would help drive the story that I'm willing
to fight, that I've got quality people out there fighting in
my defense, and that this thing could take a new turn or a new
shape, it has that potential.
Later that day, Martin's office put out a not-terribly-strong written
statement:
Martin said, "The arrest of any citizen raises very serious
constitutional questions, especially when that citizen says
that he is innocent and pled guilty in an attempt to avoid
public embarrassment. Senator Craig, like every other American
citizen, deserves the full protection of our laws. He has the
right to pursue any and all legal remedies available as he
begins the process of trying to clear his good name."
If Craig is able to withdraw his guilty plea--a big if--it seems to us
highly
probable that he would be acquitted, assuming prosecutors decide to bring
charges at all. Whether he committed lewd conduct or not depends on the
intent
behind various gestures--and here it is the policeman's word against
Craig's.
As long as Craig sticks to his story, it's hard to see how prosecutors can
prove beyond a reasonable doubt that Craig's intentions were sexual.
An acquittal, however, may not be enough to clear his good name. Craig
appears
to be guilty not only because he pleaded guilty but also because there
were
rumors of similar behavior, rumors that predated the Minneapolis incident
but
have now been given a full airing in the Idaho Statesman and elsewhere.
Although these rumors would not be admissible in court, it seems like too
much
of a coincidence that an innocent Craig would be picked up in a
bathroom-sex
sting amid all these rumors. It sounds like a bad sitcom plot.
Which brings us back to USA Today. When we saw that "Larry vs. World
Again"
headline, we took a closer look. We wanted to know what the paper had to
say
about the latest Craig twist. But the bald man in the picture turned out
to be
Larry David, creator and star of "Curb Your Enthusiasm," which begins a
new
season this weekend.
One can easily imagine Larry David's eponymous character acting just like
Larry Craig--the implausible "wide stance" excuse, the dithering over
whether
to do the right thing or the selfish thing. "Curb Your Enthusiasm" has had
plot lines involving misunderstood sexual overtures, and also ones
involving
privacy breaches in bathrooms.
The only thing is, "Curb" doesn't deal with homosexual themes. It isn't
that
edgy. Now, maybe if it were on Showtime instead of HBO . . .
--
The trouble with American journalism, in short, isn't that it's too
skeptical,
but that it's too willing to throw skepticism to the wind when it suits
the
agenda of proclaiming every war a Vietnam and every Republican president a
Nixon.
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