"Make the World Go Away - A Twisted Look at the Lost Island"
Here is what we know about, what we don't know about, the Lost Island.
It has a lot of value, but you can't see it, feel it, smell it or taste
it. Can't smoke it either. "DOOD!"
It is being protected, but no one knows from what.
It is hidden but no one knows from whom.
It is hidden but no one knows how.
You have to travel through a hell of a storm to get there, once you arrive
you are in danger of coma inducing spider bites, polar bear attacks, boar
attacks, hostile attacks, and smoke monster attacks.
Once you get to the island, your primary goal is to get off the island,
unless you smile a lot and think Jacob is the greatest, great man that
ever was afraid of a 2 cell Maglite.
Jacob can cure your cancer but he can not get his ass out of a rocking
chair.
"Help Me"...."I have to pee ......
Jacob has an eye, a head and a shanty. He appears ragged and poor, he
hates technology, but must be highly intelligent.
Is Jacob a whiz at math and did he write a manifesto?
Jacob appears to be Ted Kaczynski with an island.
The island has been home to Danielle Rousseau for sixteen years. She lives
underground, sets traps for boars and Ben-Henrys, and can still pick off a
flea at 100 yards with gunpowder that is sixteen years old. If she misses
her target with the rifle, she will return and blow it up with 200 year
old dynamite.
The Losties have been on the island for 3 months and are on a first name
basis with the others. Danielle has been on the island for sixteen years
and has never seen an Other....but she hears them... Duh!
Danielle speaks French, with a Romanian accent, but she has no arm pit
hair.
Rousseau is not really French. Duh!
The Lost island has multilevel below ground facilities, and a 3 headed
Cerberus that acts like a security system.
Hurley ate peanut butter off a butt wipe fig leaf, while he traveled to
the caves to become the island's dookie man.
Hurley is a large man. Hurley is large because he eats to much.
Hurley had to pay for two airplane tickets, for himself. Hurley is
gluttonous.
Hurley needs a quick visit by Virgil to tell him, "You are In Hell".
Sam Kinison as a Virgil would be perfect since Sam Kinison is already in
hell.
So there you have it.
An island no one can find, can't get onto, can't get off of, holds
mysteries no one understands and is being protected by some one from some
thing.
Nearly 4 years into the series and half way through the 4th season of Lost
I anxiously await the next airing of Lost, so I can learn more.
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http://www.lostdude.com
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